Your Most Important Investments

Introduction

Welcome back to another episode of Black Girl fly. I'm your girl Tanisha Nicole and I'm Shana Dixon.

Largest Five Investments

And today we are going to be talking about the biggest investments you will ever make in your entire life. Doo doo doo doo doo. Did I make that sound big enough? So I think I think we actually have some agreement on this. Okay, so top three, top three, okay, top five, because five might be where it gets squirrely. Okay. Okay. So number one yourself, I'm with that you are your biggest investment. Whether that's, I mean, I'm just gonna stop there because I think it impacts all the other numbers on this list. So yourself. I'm with it. I was number two, what you got number two, your partner, your partner? Absolutely. 1,000% is your partner and then we're going to explain these in a minute. But number three, which again? Oh, it's my turn. Yeah. I would say your home is probably the next biggest. Yeah, I know. This is where it gets.

Oh, crap. No, I don't agree with that one. Oh. I found that something else slid in there. What you children? Oh, see, I

don't have kids. That's why I was

okay, yes, I was lying to children and not decades. It's like it's your investment in the world is.

I love that. I can agree with it. So then I'll make for the whole cheater.

Number five, number five. Number five.

You got all the hard ones? Yeah, I was like, I'd say this is tough. Because so

my first thought was to get more concrete, like big companies struggle with this whole thing about your family. And to me that goes to legacy. Yeah. And relationship and what you've left to the world. And so maybe I'll open up like, counter, is that a part of you?

Is that your biggest investment? thing that seems like it goes higher than home. Alright,

so let's talk about so so you so you were like, the first thing is you so why is your biggest.

You are your Largest Investment

So when I think of me being the biggest investment, I think it has to do with so many things. I was like, oh, it's your education. Oh, it's your health. But like, at the end of the day, if you can't do anything, like, you can't invest, right? And so you have to put yourself in a position. And by prioritizing yourself to be able to take advantage of opportunities that may come your way. That's why I said that. What do you think? Well,

yeah, opportunities, and I was thinking to, like, I was thinking really concretely like, in like investing in, in your knowledge and your abilities? Right, right. And when I say abilities, I would expand that to like, your mental and your physical ability. Like for me.

Now, I have a lot of children for brain counting.

But but but I'm like, how am I gonna stick around? How am I gonna move with my infant? Right? Like, how am I going to do that? So there's so much in you, but then also, like, career wise, or not just career wise, but the the knowledge that I impart on other people, right, and those types of investments, right, like, how am I feeling that I love to be greater to be to be able to pour into other people? Wow, I'm glad we're having this conversation and that you're saying it because I always tell you.

Yeah, even I recently went to a conference. And I was inspired again. I was and it was it like, it wasn't just the content, but it was being in that environment. It's so funny. So I don't know if I've mentioned this before I did. I was in Primerica for about eight or nine years and I was actually recently talking to someone and they asked me they said, you know, was primerica a good experience like do you feel like you learned from it? Going back to the sales thing? And I was like, Absolutely. That was one of the best things that I did. I think I took more from the primary care experience than I didn't go into college. And and in Primerica there was a couple things that I did one is I was feeding myself like, like I did sales training with the best sales people in the country. I did like, I risked it all. I learned how to accept no, as an answer, right, I learned how to dig deep and give when I felt like I couldn't give any more. And I realized I was stronger and tougher than I ever thought I was. And so, but I also I learned that, that through that, that, that I was I was still capable of growing. And it wasn't just like a school environment, like you had to go to university and get a degree to be better. But it was that you get yourself in and you saw or you reap rewards for being yourself.

I love that. And so, so yeah, I mean, I think all of those things that you mentioned, basically, how awesome this lab is, like, beating ourselves so that we can continue to grow and become better and improve in, I would also say take care of ourselves, right, like the point you made about making sure we're here to continue to pour out our legacy, but also to enjoy the fruits of our labor, I think is super important. And all of that is coupled into this first. As far as the resume. Okay, there's a lot riding on that you got to do that. And what about number two? We had an episode about it.

A Partner that Contributes and Amplifies

Yeah, sure. But for me, it's realizing though, that you have to coexist with a person. And then that causes is always compromise. And you have to be sure that that person is at a level where you won't have to over compromise yourself and your values in that they can contribute, and actually probably grow you in ways that will expedite the growth in your own abilities. Right, right, or even the coming in the next class or about your children in your family. But this is a relationship that the levels and just be equally yoked. And I think that it's ultimately you have to some clinic knowledge that you guys are in this book together. Right. And it's so funny, though, it's something that I don't think that I always realized, like I always had this mentality that I could help somebody like, like I was in relationship for love. And I didn't acknowledge the importance that that relationship would have on our ability as a unit to.

Yeah, make sense. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, I think about there, there's the saying like one plus one equals three. Like when you really, you know, find yourself I'm not gonna say find yourself with the right partner. But when when you are both working towards a goal or goals, what however you have it set up, you can get there so much faster, right? It's just like this momentum is exponential. In it being single. I'm like, I can feel how slow have moved sometimes. But in some ways, I think it's a little bit faster, because I don't have you know, yeah, so I could just make decisions. But there are other times when I know it will be like it will be amazing, and probably more beneficial to have that counsel

crazy to me is the accountability.

Yeah, in your face every day. Wow. I didn't think about that. Yeah. Like,

I think this is why divorce is so

well, no, I'm just accountability.

person. I mean, I was single, I know what it's like, as a single person. You can wake up in your mass every day, and nobody would call

you on it. We let you on video.

Physically, like, just like everything literally every aspect of your life. Yeah. And you know, it even like, I've done it this way. But I can feel when he's like shopping and stuff. Like at this point, I realize he does not say to me, but I see it and I'm like oh crap. And I'm serious. So and I act and I step my game up because I'm like, wait a minute. I I didn't do better. I love my way that was hard to do at first. I love that in my head. I forget who you are. Yeah.

I love that so much because I think right like they're just trying to propel you to the next place. And yeah, that journey is not easy and not in the purse, like having that person there, though to push you along, you kind of resent them, but appreciate them. And so

and I've had conversations that we've had in and I think honestly, he was upset with me for a long time. And it was it was twofold. Well, it was that he wanted something for me. And I was I was I didn't communicate that I wasn't ready yet that I know what he wanted for me. And that I agree that ultimately is the right place for me. But I had some things that I had to get through that I shared, we didn't have that verbal conversation, right. So at one point, it came to a head, he was like, the shoulder. He was supposed to be doing this, and I don't know why you're, you're doing this. You are better than that.

That sounds like a conversation you would have with him.

But but it was good, though. Because it was like I had acknowledged that this man was really wealthy. Because he's like, I see I see greatness if you are not performing at that level. Yeah. Like, did he be like,

right. And I think that, that's really hard, though. Like it and it happens with family too. But like, really the people that are so close to you, and they like want to see you doing, you know, things at a certain level, but sometimes it can be hard to hear. But it is something you need to hear.

Right, you need to hear. And I think if it makes you question your status quo, like in my head, I had reason for that, right? If I'm not, if I'm sitting home alone, and nobody is looking at me in the mirror, right? I can excuse it away. Exactly. You can definitely get away with Yeah. So your partner go back that your partner is a huge investment in really, where you go what you are in sky.

Yeah. And I was just say, like, they amplify, right. So. So that is why is your biggest investment, they can amplify. They can text your life. got the right one. Okay, so the next one.

Leaving a Legacy

So this was where I came in with the children.

I know you came in here with the Ninja, like skirt, not a house. You kids talk tell us about it.

So I think it's for different reason, though. Like, like, ladies, all ladies know that men want children. And it's because it's their legacy. It's because it's what they leave on earth when they're gone. And they leave that Bailey Bailey lately, and in your legacy isn't just about the physical people being here. It's about what you left in them. And really, how that contribute to the rest of the world. Problem document personnel. Another reason conversation, I was having someone and they said the shadow, I just want to tell you that your mom's not here. But she would be so proud of you. I see everything that she was pushing you to be your sister. And, and I was like, I think you're right. At this point. Okay, so he can was a big thing. I was like, I don't think we can make these numbers.

I don't think so. I mean, she probably was like, Yeah, million dollars. Of course. Like, what 10 She was that guy.

And not just that, but like about leaving an impression. I think you talked about it when she died that you that's when you realize that of your inheritance wasn't just the physical. But like this podcast, about making an impression on people in, in being genuine. And being authentic, your authentic self. I think we're all important things to her. Definitely. And as I think about my children and what I want them to be, I would say all those same things, I would push as much as makeup. But I would say to it's about being a part of changing the world, and not settling for status quo where we're not challenging. What exists today and pushing boundaries, which is why kids are bad.

It's a phase. I was on a call the other day we're like teenagers, teenage girls grow up to be amazing women like but their teenage girls first who are annoying AF. So I never thought about this side note. Have the girls ever listened to the podcast? I don't think so. No. Oh my goodness. So it's gonna be like I always imagined like, whoa, after mom passed, I always was like, Man, I wish I just would have like, recorded her more. You know what I mean? It's so now I think it's so cool. We have like all these episodes and like Your daughter can go back and listen. I think that's just so cool. I love that we're doing then when I wasn't even thinking about it like that. So they can, they can learn these lessons from us from you. Right?

It didn't have to be a diary that we write to them like you see in the movies.

The People who Influence and Invest in You

I love this, y'all, I'm in my fields. Okay. Okay. That the house number four was a toss up, oh, my goodness, it was either investment or home. And I think the train we're on right now is gonna be the people that I say that these are investment. Sorry. The fifth invest most important investment we were talking about was a toss up between your home or the people, you know, extend it can be extended family can be just people you meet in your day to day lives. And so I think it depends on what angle you're going on with this.

I was because we run the financial world, I was gonna say home, but it has to be the people, the people. And the reason I say this is because I even look at relationships that I had. Relationships a mom had now that I'm actually thinking about her. Yeah. And I, I know you say not to brag or boast, but I may don't prevail your impact on people that I would round that I know that they wouldn't be the people of the day, if we didn't have that relationship. And I'm not, I'm not negating the work, they put in do that. But, but if they didn't have a person like me to see that being this thing was an option, right? And it wouldn't be who they are today. Even the most interesting thing to me, and that is one I got love for but even if I don't talk a bit about relationships, I still love them. And two, I would say that they are making impacts on people around them, I would never had the opportunity to touch because of the relationship that they have with me. Right. Right. And I do that is profound.

Man dig that. Yeah, I never think about that, honestly, until it has only happened to me a couple times in life, but they were like, I marry this person. Because you introduced us right in there. Another like morbid story was like, I would have never known this person they passed away they would like but I would have never known them and like been impacted by their life. Had you not introduced this? Right. And so I mean, I think the work that you do is more like you, you build people. Right? I would never say that I do that. Or we will never exactly say that. Some might say that about me. But I don't I wouldn't say it.

But I don't like I think a portion of what I've done too, is just open people up to experiences. I have a person I was really close to at one point in my life. And they were from like a smaller type city environment. And their parents had a really regular jobs and their parents grew up in the 50s 60s. Right. And they never met a black girl from from the Midwest, who went to private college preparatory school, and who went to the career office to figure out how much money she should make before she shows her low, lower, lower. But but but I mean that this is why so we're talking a lot about diversity. This is why diversity matters. And it's not just diversity of culture, or ethnicity, or, or sex, but its diversity

of thought. Amen.

And so I would say that the impact that I left in the world wasn't just about me as a person in me liking to build people up. Right. It was also about the fact that I have been willing to bring myself right, my thoughts, my opinions, my views, and share them with other people. And just that sharing created an opportunity that they wouldn't have had elsewhere.

Right. And as as you're saying that I think about the people who have influenced me at you know, different milestones and I'm like, Y'all, like, I would literally not be sitting here had it not been for that amazing. That's that. That's crazy, right? Like they just, they just woke up exists

on this podcast before, but my sixth grade teacher he changed my life, right? I would never know. And he I really believe that he saw something in me and he was just being himself. And I am sitting here that was my sixth grade teacher. I'm sitting here at 37. And I still, without a doubt know that he completely changed my life.

Right. Right. And so I mean, I think we put investment in people as like fourth on the list, but I think even numbers zero are going to be the people who invested in us. Right? In like us being in a space to receive that. So it just got default. Let's make that list one to five. Number one being the people who invest in us Yeah, who see things in us that we can't see. And then we can turn around and invest in ourselves. Yeah, let's go. Take it. I'll take it. No, all right. Yeah, we got to find out too much over here. So until next time, I'm your girl. Tanisha Nicole. And we are black girl fly.